Narcissistic Abuse Recovery
People with narcissistic tendencies are more common than we might expect and many of us have encountered people like this. If you are realizing that someone you have had a close relationship with may be a narcissist, you are likely trying to make sense of that relationship and the way that it has affected you. The narcissist in your life may be your partner, ex-partner, parent, sibling, child, boss, or close friend but if you are coming out from under their influence in your life (or still stuck there), you probably have some emotional trauma that is affecting the way you view yourself and relationships. I can help you make sense of the relationship patterns and behaviors that the narcissist in your life exhibits, and how this affects you. Prioritizing safety, we will work on boundary-setting and ways to manage that relationship if it must continue. Using EMDR and trauma work, we will work on your senses of self and safety that have been affected by the narcissist’s treatment of you. And we will explore the patterns and circumstances in your life that may be drawing you to unhealthy people so that you can move forward into healthier future relationships.
You ARE worth the work of recovery.
They do not seem to be able or willing to see things from your perspective. Even if they seem to be listening to you in the moment, nothing changes in their behavior.
They refuse to take accountability or responsibility for how their actions affect you or others.
In any argument, you become the guilty person and they are the victim, even if it started with something they did. You feel guilty about making them feel bad, even if they caused harm to you.
They have limited or cut off your relationships with your other family or friends, using tactics like sabotaging those relationships with conflict, claiming superiority over those people (“they are defective, beneath us”), guilting you into spending your time with themselves instead, and putting high expectations on your time for them.
They want to control your time, money, and interests.
They make subtle or direct comments that undermine your confidence and self-worth. You feel like you are never good enough.
They build their own narrative about circumstances and people, not based on evidence or rational conclusions, that support their own view of themselves and the world. They seem to fully believe this narrative most of the time. Sometimes you believe it too.
Sometimes you feel like you must be going crazy because you see or experience things they deny.
They minimize your feelings and claim you are “too sensitive” or “dramatic.”
Sometimes they can seem generous, affectionate, and supportive. This often fades quickly.
My goal is not to determine if the person in your life meets the exact criteria for a diagnosis like narcissistic personality disorder. If you want to know more about the criteria, look here.
I am more concerned about you and helping you heal from your experience.
Here are some common experiences that you may have had if you have been in relationship with a narcissistic or toxic person:
If any of this feels familiar to you, you may need a professional to help you make sense of things, determine your next steps, and start healing yourself. Contact me today and schedule a 15-minute phone consultation to see if I’m the person you want in your corner for this journey.
